The New States Of Amerika, giving up private business years ago, to satisfy the public's need for equality, is now in full battle for equal products for all Americans (No matter the price): anywhere, anytime. Dominos Pizza (Now the DPC, under the Ministry of Mozarella) has been accused of the High Crime of non-delivery to ALL areas of the country.

This would have been excusable, if it were a private company in the past, with rights of self determinaton. But, now with the new Bill of Richts, flack jackets and shock devices issued to all Domino citizens, delivery is expected everywhere. To not do so would violate the Pizza Delivery Act of 1999. Wherein, it states: "that those who refuse delivery anywhere, anytime are racist- even if they refuse to deliver to their own neighborhoods or those of their own skin color"...And thusly, all discrimination disappeared from the face of the planet. Or so we thought! Rightly, the Government (Hail and Bow) and the Judges (Hail and Bow) of the land set forth the principle that no business is owned by individuals, but by the Government (Hail and Bow) subject to it's rules and whims (or polls). Hence, Communism became the law of the land with a new name, Democrazy. Not to mention one FREE topping per order of Pizza via decree of the latest CNN Poll! Thought and Pizza Police units have been dispatched to all offending regional offices of Dominos (DPC), and offenders have been reprogrammed. Woo HOO!

*This satire brought to you by watching the very REAL debates going on in the news today (10/9/99) Example- on Fox News Channel's "Fair and Balanced Report", asking an infameous "Should" question as a teaser/lead-in, "Should Dominos be allowed to deliver where they choose?" An un-American question...as most of the "Should's" turn out to be. (It doesn't make me watch, it makes me not trust the news provider.) And, the debate that ensued was less than enlightening.*